I developed an unhealthy relationship with food and my body at the age of 15. A the age 15, I also got my first gym membership. I worked out because I wanted to change my body, but I didn't really have a perception of what I wanted. My goals were all over the place and I began to forget why I started. This was from an unhealthy relationship with not only food but body image as well. As the years went on, my obsession for the perfect body became dangerous to my mental and physical health. I excessively would go to the gym and under eat because thats what I thought I needed to do in order to lose the weight for the "perfect body". Excessively going to the gym meant beating myself up over missing a day and then forcing myself to go to the gym twice the next day to make up for it. When I did not see results from what I had thought would help me shred the pounds, I binge ate because I was sad that the results wouldn't just happen overnight. The cycle of obsession and then self pity would repeat its self numerous times until 2018, the year I chose to start loving me.
That Was Then. This Is Now.
The process of loving me is sill ongoing everyday, it is a battle and journey of ups and downs especially in todays society. Loving myself means to see my value, be grateful for my health and wanting to learn and evolve into the best version of myself. Once you see yourself as something to love and nurture, you soon forget about the labels you once gave yourself or heard from others. You take care of yourself for yourself. A healthy lifestyle is: good habits, a healthy mind, acknowledging your efforts, consistency, setting goals, wanting to better yourself and challenge yourself to achieve.
Personally I started taking care of my mental health before all else. I wanted to find a healthy outlet, that was neither the gym nor food; Journaling my thoughts, feelings and emotions really helps me.
To figure out what I should be eating, I started researching fruits and vegetables that would benefit my body the most. I then started to track my caloric intake and MACROS to become conscious of the nutritional value the food I was consuming had. By doing this I created a healthy habit of consuming lots of protein rich foods as well as eating carbs, fruits and vegetables in moderation. I don't track as strictly anymore I just believe that everyone should have a full understanding of what they put in their body. I also no longer deprive myself, I just make sure my treats are in moderation. "it's not how many times you fall but how many times you get up" this is the motto I base my eating off of which helps me battle my self deprecation.
Once my eating was on track, I then started looking for workouts that I would actually enjoy and want to keep doing. I then created a workout plan for myself that I loved; I constantly tweak it and change it depending on what I'm feeling. Some days I don't make it to the gym, and I've accepted that its not me failing, its my body telling me to rest. The gym is not my only form of physical activity, I also love to take advantage of beautiful weather and get active outside ! Also now with the pandemic and having to be at home all day, I have really taken advantage of TABATA style workouts (20 seconds of work at maximum effort, followed by 10 seconds of rest and do as many rounds as you can).
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